Do you ever find yourself stuck when faced with a decision – big or small? Perhaps you ask your friends for advice, only to feel more stressed and anxious? Many people I talk to, share this exact struggle: a heavy weight of worry which often lingers on even after the choice is made.
So what are we really afraid of when we have to make a decision? Regardless of the importance of the decision, often the fear is not about the decision itself. What we are often sitting with is an anxiety about the consequences and how we might feel in the future. In other words, we are trying to protect ourselves from a potential future disappointment, future pain or a feeling of failure.
Here are some thoughts which might offer you a different perspective:
A fair question to ask yourself is why worry about an unpredictable future when all we have is the present? The truth is, we can only make a decision based on the information we have right now and the feelings we are experiencing at this very moment about our options. Anxiety can feel lighter if we explore and identify our current feelings with respect and compassion.
The decision itself doesn’t matter as much as you being the one making it. The most important thing is that your decision aligns with your needs, wishes and core values in the present moment. When you try to predict the future and pick the best possible result you are unintentionally turning your back to your current self.
By focusing on your current needs and values you reclaim your power and energy and allow yourself to move forward with clarity and self trust.
A difficulty in decision making doesn’t mean there is something wrong with you. It means that you have learned not to trust yourself and your feelings. It means that your feelings have been repeatedly dismissed, criticised or manipulated and as a result you have grown to doubt them or suppress them. You just need to re connect with your inner compass and navigate towards choices which serve the fulfilment of your current self.
Nora Therapia 